Red: James, Oz, Daniel
Yellow: Julius, Jim, Colin
Sunny. A sloped and boggy pitch. 3-a-side. The one pass/touch rule? Of course. Subsequent confusion? Of course.
And we’re off. James had a stinking hangover. There was also a strange lackadaisical approach to the game for the first 10 or 15 minutes, a general feeling of why-are-here-bothering-to-play-a-meagre-three-a-side? I’m not going to describe all the goals. Red noticed up a few to only one Yellow response. Then Julius latched onto the fact that long shots over the advancing Red was a effective way to score. Both teams regularly shared the lead. Everyone scored. Lots.
Whilst El Capitano was grabbing a drink at half time, two decisions were made. One, no scoring from your own half. Which made sense as we’re trying to reduce the scoreline, like the one pass/touch rule. The other was made that a header would count for two goals. Ridiculous!!!! But what was most apparent was that the antipathy had gone. Both teams really really wanted the win, no matter how crazy the scoreline.
Colin was the first to get a header. Daniel got another a little while later. The most audacious shot came from Oz who tried to do half a Rene Higuita, one leg pinging up like a scorpion from behind him, the ball looping up but falling just beyond the far corner. At least three records were broken today. Both teams got over 20. We blew apart the previous combined total of 42 goals. We broke the 50 barrier and I proffer that everyone got a double hatrick! But with captain’s prerogative, I’m getting rid of the two-goals-for-a-header rule (there was only one each). It still leaves 58!!!!!!!!!! And what of the elephant in the room? Jim’s ‘tache is something to behold. Sterling work sir, step aside Frank Zappa.
And after all that, it was just a draw.
Final score: Red 29 – 29 Yellow