Yellow: Dan, Richard, Colin, Gerald, JP
Red: Kevin, Jeremy, Oz, James
…was the first line-up of teams but then we faced up to each other and agreed an imbalance. Hence the game actually started:
Red (5): Dan, Richard, Oz, Kevin, Jeremy
Yellow (4): James, Colin, JP, Gerald
And what a decision that turned out to be!
Dodgy notes taken down whilst stuck in traffic en route home before lost in my ephemeral short-term memory mean that some details are hazy at best, and as I write this three months later, are certainly not in the order of play
Colin appeared for his first game since June 2018 whilst Tufan missed his first ever pagan game! In a reflection of our passing years we have recorded our first divorce and have a second in the pipline though both chaps seem rather chipper on the subject! Someone mentioned their offspring was using one of Gerald’s books for their course and suggested he sign the copy. We didn’t change the pitch size! I know!!! And we haven’t even kicked off yet!
Anyway, onto the game….
Someone shot and from miles away and James heroically came sliding in to block the goal-bound ball. However he carried on sliding and the ball rolled in behind him. Oz got a neat chip. Richard scored from a tight angle. James shot and nutmegged Daniel in goal (who really should have done better). JP also nutmegged Daniel in goal who also deflected a corner in off his back for an own goal, thus completing a hatrick to the oppostion. Remember that – a hatrick against his own team.
Gerald pre-empted a coming-together by howling in pain as they both fell to the ground but after a second he realised he was fine. JP appealed for a penalty after being felled but the defender did just get a toe to the ball. Having taken possession at the back, Gerald dawdled. I say dawdled, it was more of a complete stop. Who should he pass to? Was he troubled by the plot of Ulysses? Anyway, Kevin nicked the ball off him and stroked into the empty net. Gerald’s team mates looking very bemused. But apparently they had a three point plan. What those three points were never revealed but JP did confess two weeks later that it was a high team morale up until the final whistle. Without Daniel in defence, Jeremy was a rock at the back. Daniel made amends with a speedy run down the wing and sending in an inch perfect cross for Oz to volley in and with the last attack finally fired in one of his own, so he’s not completely shit, contributing just three to the opposition. Remember that….three.
Final score: Red 14 – 3 Yellow
That’s right, Yellow didn’t score without Daniel’s help….a truly calamitous game for the captain. Yet he still won.