Red: Keith, Jim, Daniel, Ahmet, Martin
Yellow: Chris, Andy, Darren, Matt, Colin
So the Hairdressers didn’t show up. They didn’t even warn us that they weren’t going to show up. Calamity? No! All our yesses show up and Jim returns after six weeks away, Darren makes his annual appearance, Colin and Ahmet represent the maybes and Keith introduces Andy.
5-a-side!!!!!! Just us!!!!!
But no one could predict what was about to happen.
The ground was sodden, the worst of the winter period so far, waterlogged with plenty of surface water, even on the slope where we decided to play.
I shan’t go into details but the number of wasted opportunities, off target shots and missed open goals was biblical. The most embarrassing attempt came from Matt who, half a metre from the goal let the ball run between his standing and kicking leg. It wasn’t even moving that fast. But there were a plethora to choose from, possibly 50 shots or chances to score. To a man, everyone was guilty. The only person who seemed to come out of the game with any dignity was Andy. After having a couple of chances he decided to retreat to a more defensive position, thereby removing himself from debacle which was developing in front of both goals. And Darren clearly has a fetish for mud. A slow ball, gently rolling towards his goal encouraged him into a making a completely unnecessary diving save into the slop. And he couldn’t keep himself from out of it after that.
Matt described the events as “the best worst game.” He wasn’t wrong. But he also said Yellow were easily the better team. I’ll let him have that – it just means that they were far worse at taking their chances. Most likely to panic in front of goal? Everyone is up for the award after this game.
Final score: Red 4 – 4 Yellow